whatever

so near, and yet so far.

but i’m happy you’ve stayed right where you are.

so happy, still so blue,

i almost have everything, except you.

so hopeful, so naive,

could you tell what’s this i believe?

say hello, say goodbye.

how my heart leaps, when you smile!

so warm, yet keeping it cool.

has fate been playing me for a fool?

so surreal, yet so true.

(this lump in my throat prevents me from telling you)

so little time, so much to say,

’tis the season anyway.

please say yes, oh God please do!

will you be my valentine too?

During the past few weeks since the much-awaited Christmas break, I had been trying to understand the ‘irrationality’ of love. Faced with a seemingly insurmountable task, I marvel at how science attempts to explain the greatest entity the world has ever known.  Interestingly, there are only a few theories that claim to simplify love.  Indeed, it is simple, but why do we feel that it is too complicated for our feeble mind to grasp?

To begin with, to love is to be in a irrational state of being.  Perhaps there is indeed such a war going on between the heart and the mind!  It is truly difficult to comprehend something more powerful than reason.  And yet — it is a universal phenomena; an archetype.

Everybody is capable of loving.  Sharing love is something that enriches both the giver and the receiver.  For when you love, you don’t lose anything, yet you gain more than you have given.

True enough, Valentine is up and coming.  Pretty soon, people will romanticize love in all its perpetual glory.  Love is in the air.  And it seems to be blowing in my direction..I’m beginning to feel that tingling sensation: like a brush of air against the tip of my skin. Welcome, dear Valentine!

Emotions are indeed irrational. But it doesn’t suppose we cannot have control over it. Just like waiting for circumstances. To magically appear the way we’d like them to be.

And although we would like to think. We could create our own destinies. We realize that it just isn’t the way. The world works. After all. We are just a miniscule. Part of the wide universe.

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Sometimes we don’t always get what we want. And we are often left wondering why we didn’t. I suppose it isn’t entirely because we don’t deserve it. But maybe. It’s because we fail to realize. That we want. May not be exactly what we need.

The thing with silence is that it is so powerful that anyone can undermine it or ultimately, create fear — a crippling and debilitating emotion.

And so I fear that this deafening silence between us will last forever.  As you choose to remain unruffled, while I pretend to be unscathed and desperately try to keep still.

No words could ever describe.

This turmoil I have inside.

At times I get to think of how or why or who,

and what on earth led me to find you?

But to just know is very limiting,

to feel is too vast.

That at times like this,

It is better to just sit back

and marvel at the beauty of it all.

Because time never stands still –

what we have now

we may never have again tomorrow.